Sleep is an essential part of child development. Enough quality sleep is a key to getting kids in a headspace of being capable of functioning well. Think about it. How does your child act when they are completely rested versus when they are exhausted? Not getting enough sleep most of the time makes it nearly impossible for kids to listen, follow through with instructions, and regulate their emotions. This is why we see more tantrums and meltdowns when kids are sleep deprived. However, helping kids get the sleep they need may be easier said than done. That’s why we have created a magical child sleep meditation.
Magical Child Sleep Meditation
Our child sleep meditation wasn’t designed only to help kids fall asleep fast, sleep soundly through the night, and get enough quality sleep. Of course it does those things, but there’s more, too. It was also designed to promote positive thoughts and feelings about bedtime and sleep. Those positive thoughts and feelings carry over into good experiences day and night.
Are you ready to ditch the bedtime battles and create a positive, relaxing experience with sleep?
Before we get into the details of the child sleep meditation process, I want to cover another important component. Many families experience struggles, sometimes with yelling, when it comes to bedtime. It doesn’t have to be like that. The hour before bed can be an incredible opportunity to bond and build stronger, more positive relationships with kids. That’s exactly what we want for you and your children – a positive bedtime experience that makes life better now and for years to come. Our child sleep meditation works best when it is incorporated into bedtime routine with the same ideas of creating a positive experience.
We’ll get to the part about how to create a great pre-sleep routine. However, we first need to cover something that destroys that positive experience. There’s a common pattern that perpetuated bedtime battles and poor sleep for both kids and adults.
Let’s consider a typical scenario.
Everything is going okay until roughly dinnertime. That’s when the day generally starts to wear on us, and people begin to get tired. Kids are cranky and parents are impatient. Perhaps there’s a meltdown or temper tantum (maybe from the kids, too 😉). Things can quickly turn into chaos with screaming in the midst of preparing, eating, or cleaning up after the meal. Tensions run high.
As soon as there’s a mention of getting ready for bed things really erupt. Nobody is in a state to be agreeable and make the process easy and pleasant. It becomes a battle. The protests are… ahem… animated and loud. Perhaps something soars through the air. It may even become physically violent with flailing limbs. The process takes way longer than it needs to take and there are usually a few tears shed. What could have been an enjoyable experience of talking, spending time together, and bonding is the opposite. I’m sure you’re already aware of the negative results of this on relationships, child development, and quality of life.
This problem is bigger than a rough night.
From a sleep perspective, the real problem with the bedtime battle scenario is that it creates a cycle that reinforces negative thoughts and feelings. It leads to negativity about bedtime, and poor sleep. If your child says things like “I don’t want to go to bed!” or “I hate sleep!” then they may already be there. Kids begin to associate the bed and going to sleep with a punishment. They may struggle to fall asleep or stay asleep, leading to lying in bed awake. Time spent awake in bed reinforces the problem by sending messages to the brain that the bed is a place to be awake. Their sleep quality drops so even when they do sleep it may become restless. This only perpetuates the problem because there’s nothing pleasant about struggling to sleep.
Eventually, simply the thought of going to bed brings negative thoughts and feelings to the surface. That’s one reason for the immediate and animated objections at the first mention of bedtime.
Don’t force it.
Forcing sleep doesn’t work and it causes more problems all around. It causes more problems down the road, too, and can lead to adult insomnia if not addressed. Why doesn’t forcing sleep work? Sleep comes naturally when we are feeling tired, calm, relaxed, and safe. Adding pressure and negativity to the process of sleep does the opposite. This applies to the way we look at sleep for our kids and our own sleep. Even when kids (and adults) are exhausted it will be hard to fall asleep if the brain is worried, stressed, or feeling uneasy about something – like the need to fall asleep when we don’t want to or when it’s not coming easily.
Practical step: Aim to get kids in bed around the time they typically fall asleep.
Track sleeping patterns for about a week. You may start trying to put the kids to bed shortly after dinner. What time do they actually fall asleep? If they are awake until midnight, and you are up fighting with them for hours, skip that unpleasant part of the evening. Plan to have them in bed no earlier than 11:45pm and go from there. Gradually move bedtime earlier. This way you shift from your current reality to where you want to be without the fights. It works better and it’s a lot more pleasant.
Pro Tip: Move bedtime earlier no more than 15 minutes per week.
Any more than a 15 minute change runs the risk of making the problem worse. So, don’t make any changes until things are going smoothly. After about a week of going to sleep at the same time, bump it 15 minutes earlier. When you get impatient and tempted to adjust faster remind yourself how long bedtime has been a problem. Is it worth the longer process to make sure it works and doesn’t make things worse?
Talk to kids about the new plan and sleep.
Tell them you don’t want to have the bedtime battles anymore. Make a deal. You won’t force them to lie in bed awake, and you won’t fight with them, if they agree to work with you, too. Invite them to have a conversation about it. Ask them what they think is the problem. Try to determine why they’re struggling from their perspective. You may learn something surprising.
Talk with your children about the benefits of sleep. Discuss all the great things about creating a bedtime routine. It’s an opportunity to structure that time with things you both enjoy. You want them to be excited about this!
Let them know what to expect before it happens. Choose a day on the calendar to start the new plan. Tell them what time they will go to bed that first week. Make sure everyone is on the same page about slowly shifting to an earlier bedtime. If they resist, go back to the reasons why and the benefits of sleep.
Create a positive experience, together. Make it fun for them. Double dip so you enjoy it, too.
Before you start thinking you don’t have time for all this, consider how much time you currently waste with bedtime battles and sleepy kids. Is it 30 minutes per night for the bedtime battles? Does it drag on for hours? The good news is that the amount of time that is currently a struggle is usually about how much time is needed to turn things around. If the bedtime battle only lasts 15-30 minutes you may only need a good bedtime story. On the other hand, what if it takes hours?
You could make the first night of the new plan a game or movie night. Play or watch something together and make it a celebration of a new bedtime ritual. Start the bedtime routine after bonding over the game or move. Incorporate a conversation about what you just played or watched.
Get your kids involved. What do they like, and what do they want to do? What do you like and want? Where is the overlap?
Incorporate a child sleep meditation into the pre-sleep routine.
This is the magic of the sleep routine. Yes, it is all good. Yes, it all helps. With that being said… if you were to become overwhelmed and need to pick just one thing to do – this would be it. This is something that does the heavy lifting, so you don’t have to. Find a great child sleep meditation and use it.
Of course, try to prep the situation with your kids if you can. Talk to them, get them excited about this new step to the process, and help them understand why it’s all so important. Warn them before bedtime so it’s not a surprise change of what they expect at the end of the day. Let them look forward to it. If that’s too much in the early stages, don’t worry about it. None of it is worth your stress. That would be counterproductive. You can incorporate more of the other good stuff once you start to feel a little more rested.
So, what do you look for in a good, effective child sleep meditation?
This is important. You will want something created by someone who knows about sleep. For the best chances of being effective, there are certain elements it should hit. If some are missing, it may not work as well (or at all). There are some little details that could actually decrease the quality of sleep. Definitely don’t want that!
It should be calming, relaxing, and positive. If it’s something that increases stress or worry about bedtime it could cause more harm than good. That can be personal. Different people react differently to different things. The best option is to go for a custom recording that will be all the good things for your child and none of the bad. This can also help to make sure it’s something they like. The next best thing is to try a generic recording and see how it works.
Wondering where to find either of these options?
We can help you with both. Our custom recordings are made specifically for you and your child. They take into consider your child’s likes, dislikes, and special needs. We have a call to talk about the situation and your child, the little details. You get to answer specific questions to make sure the recording is right for your child. Then we make it from scratch just for them! If you aren’t satisfied, we will remake it based on your feedback.
Need something to hold you over until you can get a custom recording? We can help you with that, too. Click here to get access to our standard child sleep meditation.
Remember, if this one doesn’t provide the magic you were expecting, you may just need a custom recording.
Okay, so what about when you are ready to create a full routine for maximum benefits?
How to Create a Pre-sleep Routine with a Child Sleep Meditation
There’s no exact science about the perfect pre-sleep routine. It can be simple and personalized to you and your child. However, there are some strong yes and strong no components.
The standard elements of the pre-sleep routine include some thing you are probable already doing at night. We’re talking things like putting on pajamas and brushing teeth. This may be the same for you and your child, and you can do them at the same time. There should also be something to make sure thoughts are in check, and something relaxing. These elements may take a little more explaining.
Make sure thoughts are in check.
Thoughts and mood are extra important at bedtime. Being grumpy or in a bad mood about bedtime can interfere with sleep quality and quantity. This means thoughts can make it harder to fall asleep, more likely to wake up, and more likely to sleep restlessly. The best way to prevent this from happening is to shift unwanted thoughts before bed. Check in with your kids (and yourself). Is everyone in a decent mood? What about bedtime feelings, are they reasonably positive? Are they at least neutral? If not, do some thought work.
Try talking about the day. What did everyone like most about the day? Were there any challenges? Did anything surprising happen? Try to guide your child (and yourself) to finding the good in the day. Look for the positives, even in situations felt to be negative. Obviously, this will be more of a challenge on some days than others. The challenging days are the days your child needs it the most.
Tip for a rough day: play the gratitude game. Have everyone share one thing they’re grateful for. Award bonus points to anyone who elaborates in detail!
Do something relaxing.
Going to the playground or running around playing with friends is great… during the day. Many parents like to wear their kids out so they will sleep better. This is great, as long as it happens early enough. Doing it too late in the day can have the opposite effect – kids get a second wind. There needs to be a clear distinction between active time and sleep time. Make sure to separate the day from night with something relaxing. Create an environment for kids to wind down and transition.
What do you and your kids find relaxing? It should be something that calms them, and they should not be spending that time up walking around. Story time is generally a great option. It could be reading a book aloud together or everyone reading independently. It’s okay to watch shows or movies as part of the winding down process, if it happens early enough. All screens should be off at least 30 minutes before bed. Depending on the other components of the routine it may help to have an additional relaxing activity.
For example: the bedtime routine may be to take a bath, brush teeth, put on pajamas, and read. A show could be used some evenings to wind down a little before bath time.
Get creative and make this a special time for your family!
Use a Child Sleep Meditation
The child sleep meditation fits in after everything else in the pre-sleep routine. It happens right before bed to transition from relaxation time to sleep time.
Child Sleep Meditation Steps:
- Choose a special spot, with your child, like a chair in the bedroom or pillows on the floor.
- Have your child get comfortable and close their eyes.
- Guide them to take deep, calming breaths.
- In a calm voice, instruct them to relax the muscles in their body, head to toes.
- Boost relaxation by describing a calming scene.
Prefer to use our proven child sleep meditation recording?
Join our magical community and we’ll send it straight to your email!
This blog post relates to wellbeing (boosting sleep and wellbeing with a child sleep meditation). Here are some more blog posts related to the word “wellbeing” (but not about child sleep and wellbeing) from other sites:
It is Well by Jessica Weaver
https://rootedunrooted.com/blog/it-is-well
Does Comfort Lead to Wellbeing? by Sharla Hallett
www.sharlahallett.com/does-comfort-lead-to-wellbeing/
Important Ways to Improve Your Spiritual Well-being by Lindsey Gibson
http://lindseygibson.com/stressed-important-ways-to-improve-your-spiritual-well-being/
When Your Soul is Overwhelmed: Choosing “Well-Being” over “Well-Doing” by Kelly Callen Heath
https://kellycallenheath.com/when-your-soul-is-overwhelmed-choosing-well-being-over-well-doing/
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